Weddings and Funerals

 

The universe has its own odd sense of timing.  Just as I'd been echoing the loss of my nephew all those years ago, this week I got a message from my son about the loss of his fiancée's cousin.  You see, the nephew I had lost was his first cousin, this new loss is hers.

Grandma will be called upon Monday and Tuesday as the funeral requires an overnight stay for the soon to be wed couple.  It makes sense that I take Carl on as a visitor, since I'm on the periphery of this one.  

In any case, heart attacks in younger adults shake things up considerably.  This particular cousin was only 44, and this was totally unexpected.  That's barely 5 years older than my son and his intended.  A young (to me) mom, she leaves a husband and a middle school aged child behind, which adds to the disruption in their family.

I lost a first cousin myself when we as a were in our 30's.  Since cousins tend to be our initial play group as children this can be huge.  My heart aches for the younger generation that is learning this pain now.

Sunday morning:  Spring forward

Time goes on, like a river, flowing.  There's this rock at the pit of my stomach thinking of losses and their cycle.  But that river, it keeps on flowing, even if you think your world has stopped.  The wider world has not.

I woke this morning with all my clocks automatically change, except two.  The microwave and the car clocks are still manual changes.  I was pleased to discover that I didn't have to look up how to change the car clock this time!

I finished reading Debbie MacComber's A Walk Along the Beach.  Tissue box required.  It was dedicated to the memory of a friend of hers who had passed from cancer.  The content's mixture of sad and of course happy romantic ending was sure to bring on the leaky eyes.

Back to the non-fiction for the week ahead!

Monday:  Carl arrival day

My son dropped Carl off at 2 p.m., as promised.  Carl was a good boy.  Until bedtime.  He did not like having to stay overnight and whined for his "regular" humans.  It doesn't help that Grandma is a morning person, and his daddy is a night owl.  But we're doing well.  Grandma got up in the 1 a.m. hour, put on her shoes, coat, hat and gloves, and clipped a leash on his collar to take him out in the backyard to sniff and tinkle.  Then got up for good (gave up and got up) in the 4 a.m. hour to do it again. 

Which reminds me:  he's doing GREAT with the collar training!  He slows to grandma pace when I say to do so.  He's not pulling.  His "paw-rents" are doing a fine job of preparing him for his role to come. 

He's guarding the house against the cats who actually live here.  I scolded him about it Monday afternoon/evening.  "Prisoner lives here.  YOU are a guest!"  Nonetheless, The Prisoner bolted from his normal post on the deck rail.  Rubia is in the house, hiding in the basement.  She has a litter box down there, at least.

Some might ask why I put Carl on a leash when I have a fenced yard?  Well, he's mostly black.  It's night time.  And I have cataracts, to boot.  Better safe than sorry.  "OK, Google".  "Lumos".  I don't even have to touch the screen to turn on my phone's flashlight, thank goodness. 

Anyway, I asked my son for an update on the family and how they're holding up.  Predictably, the departed's young son is having a hard time.  That too-young man had said:  "I don't know how to deal with this."  That's a very mature statement for someone his age.  I said to my son that nobody does.  "When I go, you will have a hard time, even if I'm 97 by the time I do."  He just wrapped me up in a huge hug.

I'm trusting him to take care of his lady-love.  He's being there.  That's 90% of it.

I'm also wondering if this visit is going to make the honeymoon visit better or worse, as they're coming to get him Tuesday evening, and the honeymoon will be considerably longer.  

Life is good.  Keep Sparkin'!